Funny Craigs List Post

[iheartnihilism]

You think I am a lawyer, but I am actually a robot. - m4w - 28 (Midtown)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-514389234@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-19, 3:16PM EST


Just though you should know before this goes any further.

Click. Click.

[iheartnihilism]

looking for sweet grl - m4w - 25

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-513709610@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-18, 9:58PM EST

i saw her some whr but i dnt know whr.i dnt know her but i wanna meet her.if any body its u thn plz cm.i m waiting

[lordfish]

Originally Posted by iheartnihilism

You think I am a lawyer, but I am actually a robot. - m4w - 28 (Midtown)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-514389234@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-19, 3:16PM EST


Just though you should know before this goes any further.

Click. Click.

shit, they've infected our law system

[jesikat]

of course this would happen at the gay bar around the corner...

Pronto - Eye fucking - m4m - 28
Reply to: pers-517626884@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-23, 3:10AM EST


You were inside, I was outside, putting my coat on with my 2 female friends. We stared each other down for a good minute or so. Wish I could have stayed.

Hit me back. Will be out tomorrow night.

That's hot

[iheartnihilism]

You have bedbugs, I have DDT - m4w - 27

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-518486188@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-24, 11:15AM EST


What better way for a man to prove his love for a woman than for him to declare his willingness to sleep in her bedbug-infested bed? But as I was trying to tell you the other night but could not because of the damn hipster karaoke going on in the background, I can do more for you than sacrifice myself to New York's parasites; I can prevail over them. I'm a man with connections like no other, and in me, you have found a champion who can defeat these parasites both in the bedroom and in the boardroom.

[Saint Marcos]

Originally Posted by jesikat

this one has to be fake..




Pissed off girl that won my <3 - m4w - 41
Date: 2007-12-16, 9:39PM EST


Hi. I was a little bit drunk that one night when I came into the Dunkin Donuts on Woodward in Ferndale and ordered 13 eclaires. You told me I was drunk and asked me politely to leave; I called you fat and then asked you to have sex with me.

You told me "no way in hell" (or something like that, i was fairly inebriated at the time) so i threw up on you, and you threatened to call the police and then I peed my pants.

Anyway my friends dragged me out of there. I was just wondering if you wanted to go out sometime, other than the fat thing I think you were pretty cute but I can't remember (i was pretty drunk). I'm pretty desperate though, and I'm fairly confident you're single too...I mean, come on.


Thanks!

- Joe

Hey, I know that Dunkin' Donuts. (in his defense, she is a little chubby)

[jesikat]

Originally Posted by Saint Marcos

Hey, I know that Dunkin' Donuts. (in his defense, she is a little chubby)

hey if you're coming all the way out to ferndale you should stop by!

[jesikat]

*bump*

Are you going to give me some Catfish? - w4m
Date: 2008-01-07, 8:32AM EST


Let me start by stating that, I don’t know why you completely ignored me and, honestly, I could not careless. I would have appreciated a text back though. If you’ve come down with a case of cold feet that’s fine just tell me. I am a big girl, I can handle it.
If I came on too strong for you, sorry, I thought you could handle it. As I told you I’ve never cheated on my husband, I didn’t say I never thought about it. He is a wonderful husband and father, and one of my best friends; his sexual abilities on the other hand, are o.k. at very best, which is not often. I’m not trying to bash him, it’s not that he never tries; he just completely sucks at it, and not in a good way. Honestly It’s been over 5 years since I’ve really enjoyed myself, without the assistance of batteries that is. Toy’s are fun but I need the real thing.
Obviously, I’ve visited websites that specialize in discrete encounters, but never had the gut’s to do anything other than observe. The whole meeting a complete stranger for sex is a little too risky for me; I’m not that much of a freak. Although I did get a little rush out off the idea that if I really wanted too it would be so simple; but with my luck the guy/girl would end up fat and ugly or worse… So the whole internet thing will just never work out for me. I need to be comfortable with my lover and that’s just not going to happen with some anonymous person.
I’m not looking for a commitment of any kind, just the right man to satisfy my unfulfilled sexual needs, desires, and eventually fantasy’s, both mine and yours of course. If you are man enough for the task at hand, I promise you won’t be disappointed. However, if you’re not the right man for the job at least be man enough to tell me.

catfish? huh?

[MichaelG]

Originally Posted by jesikat

*bump*
catfish? huh?

I think CatFish is a sexual reference to oral sex.

But then again, catfish are bottom feeders, maybe it is Anal sex she is after.

[ryanknapper]

I saw the post:

Originally Posted by lebowski

seriously WTF. Running into a forested park

Then I saw the signature on the first reply:

Originally Posted by Aurora

"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." - Walt Disney

I thought that was funny.