Males vs. Females

[campy]

It was a huntsmen spider and it was ENORMOUS, half the height of a soup can and the diameter of a side dish with it's legs folded.

OMFG...when it comes to spiders I definitely a girl.

But back to the topic at hand, After last night I love men again...swoon

[sex_n_diamonds]

This thread makes me a little sad. When are we going to stop comparing men and women? When are we going to concentrate on our similarities as humans and not differences between the two sexes?

Everything men can do, women can do too and visa versa.

Gender is a mere societal suggestion. It should not be ruling how we live life.

I still love you all. I'm just tired of these gender binaries and am finding them effecting my life in a negative way.

[campy]

Sometimes it's nice to vent and get perspective from an un biased male. I do like to see it from that side. I do believe there are major differences between how men and women think and express. I, personally, haven't entered the thread in an attack mode, maybe a venting mode. I do love my boys and I have learned that there are things, if you live among them, to know. Like how the average guy likes to think he's just so much more basic then women. It seems to be a common dialogue I have come up against. In fact, they are as complex as women. They just express it differently. So there's an example of how men and women are the same...but maybe see it from different angles.

Anyway, I do like the conversation. I have learned things in these threads!

[BrianAlt]

The Top 8 Ways Men & Women are Alike - Stronger Marriage - strongermarriage.org

The Top 8 Ways Men & Women Are Alike

• Both men and women need to feel safe and secure. Safety and security are two of the basic elements of trust, and trust is at the heart of every healthy and happy relationship. Safety and security are sometimes used synonymously by family experts with the word "attachment" which begins as far back in the life cycle as infancy. Abraham Maslow established his famous hierarchy of needs that leads toward self-actualization with this basic level of safety and security.
• Both men and women need to develop a positive picture of themselves. We need to view ourselves in a positive light. If we can't, then we tend to drain ourselves and those around us of love. Our perceptions of ourselves greatly influence our ability to interact in a healthy way with others in our environment.
• Both men and women need to value themselves and to feel valued by others. Self-esteem (i.e., valuing ourselves) and being valued by others are two important keys that unlock the door to life satisfaction. To value is to prize, to rate highly, to perceive as important, and to judge as being of great worth.
• Both men and women need to be involved in close, loving relationships. People need to feel connected to others socially, mentally, and emotionally. However, those who are skilled look for healthy and unhealthy signs of love and closeness in their relationships and will not settle for relationships that are unhealthy (see The TOP 25 Signs to Watch Out For).
• Both men and women need to feel like they belong. This need underlies many of the choices that we make. Psychologists have found that we are motivated to act or behave in accordance with whom we perceive we belong to the most. For example, if we perceive that we belong to our friends the most, then they will have the most influence over our behavior. If we perceive that we belong to a parent or a partner the most, then this individual will have the most influence over our behavior. This innate desire men and women have to belong is so powerful that it can even transcend value and belief systems (e.g., succumbing to peer pressure, cheating on a partner, etc).
• Both men and women need to feel self-respect and to feel like they are respected by others. We achieve self-respect when we are trying to live according to what we value and believe. Any discrepancy between our actual behaviors and what we value and believe causes us to experience what psychologists call "cognitive dissonance." When we respect ourselves by living according to what we value and believe, it is more likely that we will be respected by others.
• Both men and women need to be growing and developing in mental, physical, social, emotional, and spiritual ways. Famous researcher Sandra Scarr believes that if individuals are given an "average expectable environment" in which to live and to operate that they will generally develop healthy characteristics. Part of this "average expectable environment" means that we must be given ample opportunities to grow and develop mentally, physically, socially, emotionally, and spiritually. Therefore, for most of us, if we are bored, or if we feel like we are stagnating, the way forward is to choose to learn, develop, and grow in one or more of these areas.
• Both men and women need to feel competent or like they are good at doing or achieving certain things. We all need to feel like we are competent and talented in certain areas. Calvin W. Taylor, a professor at the University of Utah, proposed the following six general competency or talent categories:
  1. Academic
  2. Communication
  3. Creative
  4. Decision-Making
  5. Forecasting
  6. Planning