O doctorsleep, where art thou?

[Medium Brumski]

Originally Posted by doctorsleep

How many people here have reached 23 without even a fucking DATE

No one. They actually had some balls and killed themselves at 22.

[Zaumaum]

Even if, miraculously, a beautiful, mature woman saw potential in you, took you on as a project-boyfriend, and junglefucked you every day, you'd still have issues to work out.

Your simple obsession is a defense against all the work you have to do.

- Find a therapist who will really talk to you about this stuff.

- Get into an environment where you can make big changes, (that's the main reason people need to get out of their parents' houses.)

- Respect your health, build yourself from the bottom-up. Then, you can focus on developing sustainable relationships.

Stop obsessing. You're old enough now to be able to do that, even with all the damage that you've undergone.

[doctorsleep]

Originally Posted by Zaumaum

Even if, miraculously, a beautiful, mature woman saw potential in you, took you on as a project-boyfriend, and junglefucked you every day, you'd still have issues to work out.

Your simple obsession is a defense against all the work you have to do.

- Find a therapist who will really talk to you about this stuff.

- Get into an environment where you can make big changes, (that's the main reason people need to get out of their parents' houses.)

- Respect your health, build yourself from the bottom-up. Then, you can focus on developing sustainable relationships.

Stop obsessing. You're old enough now to be able to do that, even with all the damage that you've undergone.

that still doesn't explain the problem, I know I have a problem, hell, several. But I hate when people say "Getting a girlfreind isn't your problem"

and then when i ask "Well what is the problem?"

They say "You don't know what your problem is, you need to solve that."

I just want a damn girlfreind, I want the same thing everyone else has/wants. Its just harder for me beacuse i'm a fuck up and that pisses me off. And I'm trying but it still just hasn't happened yet. I feel like its never going to happen, and if its never going to happen then what is even the fucking point of trying.

[DWarrior]

Originally Posted by doctorsleep

and then when i ask "Well what is the problem?"

They say "You don't know what your problem is, you need to solve that."

Brah, Zaumaum just gave you a list of your problems, what the shit.

[doctorsleep]

Originally Posted by DWarrior

Brah, Zaumaum just gave you a list of your problems, what the shit.

Originally Posted by Zaumaum

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND MY PROBLEMS

This is what I'm having trouble comprehending

I CREATE FALSE-PROBLEMS TO DEFEND MYSELF AGAINST THEM

I assume by this you mean my problem of not being able to find a girlfreind

I COMPENSATE FOR THEIR FALSEHOOD BY MAKING THEM SEEM FATAL

Im not saying "Oh ill just die if don't get fucked" like an emo twit, i'm just realizing that if its not going to happen there is no point in trying anymore.

MY REAL-PROBLEMS ARE NOT FATAL BUT THEY ARE MUCH MORE TERRIFYING

Again, What are the "real" problems

THEY ARE MUCH MORE TERRIFYING BECAUSE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THEM

Your right, I don't

I NEED COMPETENT SUPPORT AND TREATMENT BECAUSE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND MY PROBLEMS

Whenever I try to talk about relationships they feed me the Same BS about "Oh, just love yourself and love will come" or "if you stop trying they fall right into your lap tee hee"

IT IS MY RESPONSIBILITY TO GAIN ACCESS TO COMPETENT SUPPORT AND TREATMENT BECAUSE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND MY PROBLEMS

your right, I DON'T UNDERSTAND

IT IS MY RESPONSIBILITY TO STOP IMPOSING ULTIMATUMS BECAUSE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND MY PROBLEMS

So I'm supposed to NOT tell myself I need to fix whats wrong

IT IS MY RESPONSIBILITY TO ACCEPT THAT I NEED HELP IN ORDER TO UNDERSTAND MY PROBLEMS

I do, and I'm desperate for it but I just can't seem to find any that has actually netted real results

edit: I need to accept that when I'm able to manage my problems, there will be nothing significant in the way of me loving and being loved.

Again, what problems. The only problem i can see is that I can't operate anymore without a girlfreind, I need one soon or I will just give up

THAT LIST!

[DWarrior]

Originally Posted by Zaumaum

Even if, miraculously, a beautiful, mature woman saw potential in you, took you on as a project-boyfriend, and junglefucked you every day, you'd still have issues to work out.

Your simple obsession is a defense against all the work you have to do.

- Find a therapist who will really talk to you about this stuff.

- Get into an environment where you can make big changes, (that's the main reason people need to get out of their parents' houses.)

- Respect your health, build yourself from the bottom-up. Then, you can focus on developing sustainable relationships.

Stop obsessing. You're old enough now to be able to do that, even with all the damage that you've undergone.

This one, breh.

[fluxquanta]

Originally Posted by doctorsleep

How many people here have reached 23 without even a fucking DATE

Okay, this shit is starting to really get to me so I'm going to come right out with it.

I'm 24. I've had dates, but I'm also virgin. I went through all of high school and college that way. I have had dates and girls have offered to fuck me, but I didn't accept, because they had...reputations. I don't make it my whole existence. My standards are pretty high and I'm a pretty big pussy when it comes to girls I like, but I move on and don't let it destroy me. It will happen when it happens.

Are you fucking happy now? Stop using the whole "EVERYONE ELSE IS BETTER THAN ME" excuse.

[Sapgreenpeppers]

Sleep, I know this falls on deaf ears, but I feel as though I must. It takes some people longer to figure things out. I said it once, I'll say it to death, because I had to learn this the fucking hard way. If you ask/welcome/invite people to shit on you, they will. Stop asking the world to help you feel like a freak. You need to find something to do that is self contained, that you can excel at and build some fucking confidence. Running, drawing, chess....I don't know what will work for you, but find something.


Remember, I asked this whole motherfucking forum to help me beat myself for being a fat girl who couldn't get laid. Guess what I'm not doing these days. I found someone who liked me, AFTER I stopped hating myself. Guess what else, I stopped hating myself and now I've lost a good 2 dress sizes.

Put the whip down. And suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary growing pain. Go find something that is not a girl that makes you happy, and start owning your shit. And FFS quit asking other people for self-flagellation assistance.

This has been a public service announcement.

[DaveNJ]

Originally Posted by doctorsleep

maybe I don't, If I had to guess its that my fear that I'm not going to get a girlfreind makes me so nervous and destroys confidence so much that it makes it even harder to get a girlfreind.

All that on top of the fact that I care about getting a girlfreind more then anything else, even though damn near everyone else gets it so they don't understand what its like to feel like ill NEVER have one. even if they had felt like that before at leas you all know its possible! How many people here have reached 23 without even a fucking DATE

Lots of people. Most people who are virgins through college aren't contemplating suicide. Thus, you have other issues. Address those.

[dannyhatch]

I'm sure I'm not the first person to tell you this, but, while sex is great, it's also not the final destination for, nor is it near the most important thing about, life. Focus on other things, getting a job with that degree, meeting people, making money, and changing yourself and the sex will follow. I have to say, the Internet is the worst thing to ever happen to you, sleep. I hope you find peace, though.