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Old 03-21-2014, 10:38 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Scummy's Grand Adventure: A Story in 35,000 Parts

Hi everyone, I thought it would be fun to get a bit creative and do some collaborative storytelling. Everyone is welcome to contribute! We're starting with Scumhook as the protagonist, but this story can go anywhere. Basically just pick up where the last person finished, and write as much or as little as you like.

Chapter 1: The Scummoning
Scumhook, aka Big Dick Charles, aka Little Dick Gary, sat crouched over his small desk in a squat gray office building in the municipality of Wellington, New Zealand.

"My job might be utter shite, but at least I can be proud of this great nation I call home," Scumhook said out loud, to absolutely nobody.

Carol in HR walked by and noticed that Scumhook had the KATG chat room open on his monitor. "Now Scummy, we've talked about this. When you're in the Hudson's Bluetooth Earpiece Consortium, your time belongs to us. Don't make me take away your pudding privileges."

Scumhook was as dejected as ever. Then something outside the window caught his eye...
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Old 03-21-2014, 11:05 AM   #2 (permalink)
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The End.
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Old 03-21-2014, 11:08 AM   #3 (permalink)
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It was another penis that he could suck on.

Bad news was, even though he was far and away The Dick Sucking Champion of New Zealand, this was the penis that finally choked him and killed him. He was simply far too eager to suck down another one, and his passion was his undoing. There was no one in the entire universe, spiritual and otherwise, that would be able to save him. This was definitely, without question, his death and the end of his story.

At least he died doing what he loved.

THE ABSOLUTE END
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Old 03-21-2014, 11:10 AM   #4 (permalink)
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I'm enjoying the storytelling so far, the bit about Carol in HR was particularly inspired, but uh, let's please stop saying The End.
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Old 03-21-2014, 11:28 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Scumhook was undoubtedly dead, in this universe. But as we all know, there are an infinite amount of universes and an infinite amount of Scumhooks. All the Scumhooks in all the universes shared a collective shudder as one of their number went down by engorged penis.

Scumhook #85219 had a southern drawl, wore a big cowboy hat, and his boot spurs clanked with every step. This was off-putting to those around him because he was born and lived in Ukraine.

"My job might be utter shite, but at least I can be proud of this great nation I call home," Scumhook said out loud, to absolutely nobody.

He was a bureaucrat in the government but he longed for so much more. He wheeled over to the lunchroom (he got by everywhere with a large scooter), and began eating his egg and mayo sandwich. Bruce from HR walked in the door...
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Old 03-21-2014, 11:41 AM   #6 (permalink)
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...and this Scumhook immediately blew him.

Like all Scumhook's, this Scumhook was Dick Sucking Champion of HIS town.

He choked on Bruce's dick and died. He was too eager.

All Scumhooks everywhere died from dick sucking.

The story of how or why they all died from sucking dick, especially after they were the champions of it for so long, is, shockingly enough, not an interesting one to tell at all. It should be noted, however, that they all, in fact, died utterly and completely.

We can only imagine that God needed his dick sucked by the best.

THE DEFINITE END
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Old 03-21-2014, 12:09 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Ok, I saw that coming.

Chapter 2: A New And Fresh Beginning That Will Assuredly Not End Any Time Soon
Keith Salley sat in his favourite independent Cafe and sipped delicately on his Grande Affogato. He finished typing on his laptop, hit submit and let out a high pitched squeal. "Oh, how absolutely delightful, I've derailed this thread completely!" said Keith with the utmost glee. "Now time to go back to my job as an HR rep."

Keith Salley was an HR rep. What people didn't know, was that every night he also performed stand-up at a dive bar named "Big Jim's" to a crowd of a half-dozen people. Big Jim, the owner of "Big Jim's", never told Keith he could perform in his bar, but he didn't have the heart to crush this young man's dreams.

"What's the deal with women, am I right?" Keith 'joked', "I don't get them."
The crowd smiled awkwardly.
"So my doctor says I have Herpes. Okay, that's all my time tonight, have a good one everyone!"

This night was different however. A man walked up to Keith and said "Mr. Salley, my name is Jared, and I'm a talent agent. Boy do I have news for you..."
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Old 03-21-2014, 12:33 PM   #8 (permalink)
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The news was so amazing that it exploded the world.

THE END
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Old 03-21-2014, 12:47 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Fine, you win!
No malicious intent on my part by the way. Just trying to have fun and get the forum engaged. If someone wants to try and continue the story somehow, that would be great.

I think if you go by the majority of the forums, you'll see that people want this thread to continue. It currently sits at a 5 star rating!

Last edited by Scat; 03-21-2014 at 01:20 PM.
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Old 03-21-2014, 01:44 PM   #10 (permalink)
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"Keith!", Cat yelled, "We are late, get off your laptop".

Keith replied, "I just need 5 more minutes to finishing hacking Scat's thread and give it 5 stars!"

You see, no detail is too small when Keith does improve. He is 2nd only to this guy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rvFExaga98
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