Funny Craigs List Post

[King of Assholes]

This is a classic for KATG listeners

I passed out and puked all over your truck and myself - w4m - 25
Reply to: pers-530765164@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-01-07, 7:38AM EST


You so gentlemenly somehow got me in your truck after a long night of drinking. (I don't remember). In fact, I have absolutely no recollection of the ride 45 minutes home and away from the starting location. I woke up in your truck and there was a wonderful coating of puke on me from head to toe (literally). WTF happened?!! We were parked 1 block away from my home (you didn't know exactly where I lived) and I had no idea where I was. I was freaking out!! In a hazey memory I open the door and fall to the pavement. I lied there as I just wanted to sleep on that comfy black tar. You got out to help me but I dragged myself back in. Then, ALAS! I recognized my neighbor's house. You pulled in my driveway and I gathered my things and stumbled out. Now, as you can imagine, I wake up full of questions with NO memory to give me answers. Kind sir, what the hell happened that night? I've never had such an incident since I was about 15. In fact, in all of my college years, had nothing happened like this one. The money in my bra was still intact. My pants were still neatly tucked in my brand new boots covered in vomit. My vagina wasn't sore. So then WTF happened?!! That delightful morning I woke up naked on the floor of my bedroom with chunks in my hair and the foul smell simmering. Two weeks have passed. No memories have be recovered. However, thank you for ride home (surely it must have been a crazy one for you?!) and sorry for any chucks I left behind in your truck. Wanna go on a date sometime?

[marina]

Originally Posted by Some Douche

looking for a sugar mama is that you???? (west la)
Reply to: gigs-650951809@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-04-21, 2:37PM PDT


must be a women 21 thru 30 nice body and shape, and beautiful. looking to spoiled a 22 year guy take him out to dinner, shop and have sex , etc if so send pic to or contact datboyso_sicc@yahoo.com

HAAAHAHAHA!

[iheartnihilism]

I'm bored and drunk so i'm trolling cl for weird stuff and thought i'd revive this thread:

You called me both Harry Potter and gay. - m4w - 26 (Jersey)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-929327361@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-11-22, 1:31AM EST



When I first laid eyes upon you, I saw you giving a random stranger shit about having a bike on the path train. Our eyes met and then you called me Harry Potter. We both boarded the bus bound for Bayonne and you asked me for my monthly pass so your friend wouldn't have to pay. I neglected your offer and you once again called me Harry Potter and also gay. I laughed at your wonderful insult. I also couldn't help but notice that you clearly had herpes on your upper lip. So really the question is...wanna do lunch?

[djoh615893]

Reply to: pers-937633673@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-11-28, 11:56PM CST



You haunt my dreams often. I have barely spoken but a couple of words to you in real life but we have been naked together before. You seemed to enjoy it a bit even. I remember the first time I saw you across the water. I was instantly attached. you are so beautiful and full of loving energy. Sometimes you show up in my dreams and smile and tell me things that make me want you more. I don't even know why I am so drawn to you. I just wish you weren't married so I could feel better about talking to you. not that my lover shouldn't have lovers but i dunno. Hopefully I will be seeing you again in a couple of weeks when I return to Austin. stay beautiful my camera pulsar(not that I'm at all worried that you'd ever fade).




Location: in dreams
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

[club america]

Jerking while driving - 28 (Edens)
Reply to: pers-944085532@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-12-03, 7:32PM CST


Does anyone out there get turned on by jerking while they drive? Does it turn you on if someone catches you stroking in your car? Just wondering if anyone does this like I do.




* Location: Edens
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests








The Grind - m4w - 25 (Lincoln Square)
Reply to: pers-944233248@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-12-03, 9:43PM CST


You made my tuna sandwich at The Grind tonight. It was delicious. And you are beautiful. Just thought you should know in case you didn't.




* Location: Lincoln Square
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



I don't expect you to 'get me'.... - m4m - 27
Reply to: pers-944125394@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-12-03, 8:05PM CST


I'm probably too nice for my own damn good. I can be smothering at times, but this is who I am and it makes me happy when I make others happy. I'm not trying to win you over again cause I'm really over all that. I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm not some egocentric run of the mill fag who's bitchy, catty, and concerned about my looks all the time. I'm a very considerate, smart, a bit shy, but really down to earth pretty old fashioned type gentleman. I was just going through some shit and trying to figure out my heart when we met. And I'm really glad I had the chance to meet you.

I broke one of my own rules when I met you. I went home with you the first night we met. So you're the forth on that list and really does take alot for me to trust a guy enough for me to go home with them. But you seemed warm and you are.

Now I'm a nuisance cause I'd like to at least get a friendship out of this, but you probably see it as my sly attempt to try and get something more out you/us. I just want you to be happy bro. Well you'll either get me or you won't..... there are some genuine people still out there who just wanna be good to others just because they can and because they are that way.

You told me about a quote that went something like... "We're so busy trying to love the right one, when we never learn how to love the right way." Loving the right way is to love just for the sake of loving.... unselfishly. When everything else is gone all you have left is love. To love is expecting nothing in return only that awesome you feeling that YOU create from deep inside yourself knowing you're doing something right for someone else, not only yourself.

Hmmm maybe I am just wasting my time trying too much.... but that love I've got to give that comes from within me never ceases. So you'll either get me or you won't, but either way I'm giving you some well deserved space.

Peace and love and love and peace

[marina]

Originally Posted by club america

Peace and love and love and peace

Ringo?

[marina]

Cardio equipment (SCV)
Reply to: sale-942887523@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-12-04, 6:16AM PST


Do you have exercise equipment that you no longer use just sitting around and taking up space? I would love to borrow it. I am looking for some type of cardio equipment, like a treadclimber or elliptical. If you have something and are willing to help me get in shape please contact me. Again, I only want to borrow-I can't afford to buy anything but I need to get in shape. Thanks!




* Location: SCV
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

[Spanky McDuck]

Lookin for a awesome person


Ran across this one tonight... Think I'll pass.

[starnoble]

This cats ad is by far the funniest craigslist ad, check it out:

Best Craigslist Ad Ever | Ology

hahaha!

[DudeEMETIB]

Originally Posted by starnoble

This cats ad is by far the funniest craigslist ad, check it out:

Best Craigslist Ad Ever | Ology

hahaha!

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!

and welcome to the forums!