Show Notes

• Manic Depressive: I was in jail, I manipulated my way into someone else's hotel room because the U.S. were in cahoots with the Nazis
• Poker Laws: This guy died and fell onto the table mixing two players' chips, so if you die nowadays playing poker it means you're All In
• Montenegro: 4 1/2 hours of opening ceremonies?! Every country I got to see?! I'll see you when you skate!
• What A Luger: The risk of death, does that make it sport? Yes, golf is not a sport.
• Saudi Arabia Hates Fun: Do not celebrate love. If you celebrate love we will kill you. You can have your 72 virgins when you die. That's not enough?
• Renovating: I knew we hadn't cleaned in a while when I had to dust off the vacuum cleaner
• Pregnant Men: Yeah, I always carry those big screen TVs in my belly...
• Housebound Fat: I know I give amazing head, but my boyfriend is in love with another woman, so naturally the three of us should date
• Surprise It's Valentine's Day: Adam Brown surprises his girlfriend with a gay wooden heart
• Rhythm 544: We were a fake group and we went on tour, even though it was just me
• Nani Shelf: Does the bullet work in the butt? Is there a safety on it? Can it get sucked in?
• Will You Buy This Book?: No, I don't like Keith or Chemda. I'm a dick.
• Nincompoops and Faggots: I gave Perez Hilton the tonguiest kiss as if I hated faggots
• Stand-Up Submissions: Elvis does Arnold; Grocery bag phobia; Missouri is boring; Prop Comedy; Roderick is not fat; Julio can read; Cheese is from Michigan