1734: Stay in School

Show Notes

• — CANDY!: Liz Miele, a depressed fit binge-eater that is loved by everyone, is in the studio
• — Animal Attraction: Liz's boyfriend is allergic to her cat, and they would have to break up if his allergy medication stopped working
• — Labor Of Love: Liz finally booked some college gigs, but the audition process cost her an obscene amount of money
• — Higher Education: Liz believes college is a waste of time
• — Happy To Serve You: Customer service and the show Undercover Boss is dissected
• — Gash: Two gentlemen got into a knife fight over switching positions while simultaneously having sex with a consenting woman
• — Fair Trade: A man is trading guns for Beyoncé and Jay-Z tickets in a totally not-racist effort to curb gun violence
• — Fair-Weather Father: Keith's dad still doesn't recognize Keith's success as a talk show host despite trying to get him to promote his book
• — This Week In Pope: $450,000 has been spent betting on who the new Pope will be, and the discovery of an underground Vatican gay sex ring is allegedly the reason the Pope and other higher-ups are stepping down
• — Beer Snobs: Anheuser-Busch was found to have watered down its beers and is being sued for millions of dollars
• — Dancing With The Somewhat Recognized: Wynonna Judd, D.L. Hughley and Andy Dick are among the contestants on the upcoming season of Dancing with the Stars
• — Mary J. Broke: Mary J. Blige owes nearly a million dollars in back taxes and was sued by Bank of America for defaulting on a $500,000 loan