Latest Episode
Play
Keith Malley New Comedy Album - A Future To Believe In

Show Notes and Pictures

KATG 2459: Sister Morphine

with Wendi Starling and Krystyna Hutchinson – Wendi’s literal sexual demon; My Name Is Keith recap; meeting Ashanti and Ja Rule; Wendi’s sugar daddy update; Chemda’s biopsy; Don’t Breathe and Hell or High Water reviewed; speed-walking Olympian soils himself on TV; Michael Moore defends Ryan Lochte; Colin Kaepernick refuses to stand during NFL preseason game’s National Anthem August 28, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — Glamorous Pussies: Wendi Starling and Krystyna Hutchinson, co-hosts of the Glamourpuss stand-up show, are in studio
  • — Bruce: Wendi, who got very handsy with her drunk self after recording My Name Is Keith, has a recurring dream where a demon chokes her and wakes her up with an orgasm
  • — Let’s Touch Butts: Krystyna paid $50 to meet Ashanti and Ja Rule
  • — Payroll: Wendi gives an update on her married sugar daddy, who’s so nice to her that she thinks she could actually be in a real relationship one day. Krystyna has never prostituted herself but she won’t rule it out.
  • — Mighty Morphine Power Ranger: Chemda had her biopsy on Thursday but won’t know the results until next Thursday. She is now a morphine addict. Krystyna shares her own ovary-bursting morphine experience.
  • — What Movies Did Keith Hate This Weekend?: Keith reviews Don’t Breathe and Hell or High Water. Krystyna loves Anthony Weiner now that she’s seen the Weiner documentary.
  • — Tough Shit: A French speed-walking champion has suffered a series of unfortunate Olympics mishaps since 2008, including soiling himself and collapsing on the track in Rio
  • — Dancing With The Liars: Ryan Lochte will appear on the upcoming season of Dancing with the Stars thanks to a deal made before he lied about being mugged in Rio. Michael Moore is defending Ryan on Facebook.
  • — What About The Troops: San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick has faced strong backlash for refusing to stand during a preseason game’s singing of the National Anthem out of solidarity for black lives

Pictures

Krystyna Hutchinson and Wendi Starling
Krystyna Hutchinson and Wendi Starling
Wendi after My Name Is Keith
Wendi after My Name Is Keith
Krystyna and her friend meet Ashanti and Ja Rule
Krystyna and her friend meet Ashanti and Ja Rule
Chemda's biopsy
Chemda's biopsy




Ryan Lochte
Ryan Lochte

Michael Moore
Michael Moore
Colin Kaepernick refusing to stand for the National Anthem
Colin Kaepernick refusing to stand for the National Anthem
Colin Kaepernicking
Colin Kaepernicking
Colin's car and house
Colin's car and house
Yohann Diniz
Yohann Diniz
Yohann's poop
Yohann's poop

KATG 2458: Cruisin’

with Erin Jackson — Big eyes; Chemda's Cancer Kit; performing on a cruise ship; fake sport fans; poor vision; black universities; states that are nice to women; man stabs interracial couple; woman puts live baby in refrigerator; Keith's Nazi tattoo idea; a fellatio cafe; no-Pokémon Go for kid touchers; woman can't drown herself August 26, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — You'll Love Her, I Promise: Erin Jackson, a great stand-up comedian, is in studio
  • — Passionate Eyes: Erin has giant, very expressive eyeballs and she can’t help it if people misinterpret her
  • — Dopey Sick Pot: Hennessy gave Chemda a cancer kit featuring disinfectant spray and weed pills. Erin has never smoked pot but she really wants to.
  • — I’m On A Boat: Erin just returned from a monthlong cruise where she performed stand-up
  • — Dad Jokes: Erin’s parents did not encourage her to do stand-up (or to be born a woman), but her dad is coming around
  • — The Downs: Erin is a big sports fan and wanted to be a sportscaster before she realized what female sportscasters have to go through. Keith and Erin discuss fake sport fans.
  • — -12: Erin and Keith bond over their very poor vision
  • — Black Math: Erin discusses her experience at Howard University, an historically black university
  • — Surf's Up For All Genders: Hawaii tops the list of the best states for women. You can imagine what the worst ones are.
  • — That’s Too Much, Man: A white supremacist stabbed a random couple because they were interracial. A woman killed her baby after putting it in the fridge for 3 hours.
  • — Raping Kids Is Fun: Keith introduces his latest, greatest idea: free tattoos for Nazis
  • — Extra Cream: A cafe where patrons can order coffee and blowjobs has been proposed for London after being green-lit in Geneva
  • — Fighting The Good Fight: The New York Civil Liberties Union is protesting the ban on Pokémon Go for sex offenders
  • — Cry Me A River: A very determined suicidal woman had to be rescued from the water in which she tried to drown herself 3 times in a row

Guests

Erin JacksonErin Jackson

Pictures

Erin Jackson
Erin Jackson
Schwarzenegger on Mars
Schwarzenegger on Mars

Michael Vick
Michael Vick
Erin Andrews
Erin Andrews
Howard University
Howard University
Daniel Rowe, the man who stabbed an interracial couple
Daniel Rowe, the man who stabbed an interracial couple
Angela Blackwell the mom who killed her baby by putting it in a refrigerator
Angela Blackwell the mom who killed her baby by putting it in a refrigerator

KATG 2457: Body of Work

Biopsy preparations; bagpipe murders; nude Donald Trump statues; Leslie Jones’s nudes and personal info hacked; Courtney Cox regrets plastic surgery and David Schwimmer regrets fame; Usain Bolt cheats on fiancée at Olympics; the privilege of high school athletes; Nazi reenactor proposes in full uniform; man wears bug-infested shirt to wedding; Ryan Lochte lies about bed bugs; pizza sending prankster no longer allowed to order pizza; a rapist must call police 24 hours before any sex; woman drives over man to leave party; man runs from 4-year-old daughter during a drive-by; Barbra Streisand complains to Apple how Siri pronounces her name August 25, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — For Now: Keith and Chemda are in studio
  • — Good Bye Chemda: Chemda discusses the preparations for her biopsy and puts out a call for babies in her arms
  • — In The Bag: 80% of KATG’s audience would rather shit in a bag than a diaper, just like Keith
  • — Rest In Pipe: A man was killed by the bacteria in his bagpipes
  • — Unpermitted Erections: An activist collective set up nude statues of Donald Trump in multiple cities
  • — Saturday Night Lame: Hackers posted Leslie Jones’s private nude pictures and ID photos on her website
  • — The One Where The Gellers Are Terrible: Courteney Cox regrets getting plastic surgery. David Schwimmer regrets how famous Friends made him.
  • — Pulling A Fast One: Usain Bolt was photographed celebrating his Olympic medals with 3 different women in one night, despite his fiancée back home in Jamaica
  • — Brock Turner Overdrive: A judge let an 18-year-old rapist off light so his college career and future wouldn’t be ruined
  • — Mazel Tov: A World War II reenactor proposed to his girlfriend while dressed as a Nazi
  • — Bugging Out: A man is suing Men’s Wearhouse for, among other things, loss of sex after the shirt he rented for his wedding came infested with bugs. Ryan Lochte lied about bedbugs in 2012 to get moved to a hotel closer to clubs.
  • — Shitty People: A Florida man is no longer allowed to order pizza after pranking various pizzerias multiple times. A man in a van screamed in Chemda’s face in an attempt to startle her and make her fall off of her bike.
  • — Tally Ho: A British sex fiend must clear all potential sexcapades with the police 24 hours in advance
  • — Party Foul: A man lied down in front of his friend’s car to try to keep her from leaving a party. She decided to leave anyway and ran over him. He died.
  • — Father Of The Year: A man abandoned his 4-year-old daughter and left her to fend for himself during a drive-by shooting
  • — White People Problems: Barbra Streisand called Apple CEO Tim Cook to complain because Siri mispronounces her name

Pictures

Chemda's new profile pic
Chemda's new profile pic
Hennessy's cancer book
Hennessy's cancer book
The naked Donald Trump statue
The naked Donald Trump statue

Leslie Jones
Leslie Jones
Courteney Cox
Courteney Cox
David Schwimmer
David Schwimmer
Usain Bolt
Usain Bolt
Usain's fiancée Kasi Bennett
Usain's fiancée Kasi Bennett
Not Usain's fiancée
Not Usain's fiancée
Not Usain's fiancée
Not Usain's fiancée
Not Usain's fiancée
Not Usain's fiancée
18-year-old rapist David Becker
18-year-old rapist David Becker
Tom Sweet and his new fiancée Marcela Montoya
Tom Sweet and his new fiancée Marcela Montoya

Ryan Lochte
Ryan Lochte
Randy Riddle, the man who's not allowed to order pizza anymore
Randy Riddle, the man who's not allowed to order pizza anymore
Barbra Streisand
Barbra Streisand

KATG 2456: Window to the Soul

with Erin Judge – Being in a bisexual open relationship while married; 15-year-olds dating 19-year-olds; Erin’s lesbian parents; self-pep talks; the last time you cried; Ryan Lochte’s lost sponsorships and ovulating Olympians; playing Monopoly with Daymond John; Keith’s bathtub evacuations; Indian police constable eats 40 knives; KATG polls August 24, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — Not Abbi Crutchfield: Erin Judge, comedian, author, and member of the Pink Collar Comedy Tour, is in studio
  • — Walk The Walk, Fuck The Fuck: Erin has been married and in an open relationship since she was 22
  • — A Simpler Time: Erin discusses the 19-year-olds she dated when she was a 15-year-old cutter
  • — Secrets Are Bad: Erin’s mother left Erin’s father for another woman and made Erin keep it a secret from everyone
  • — Vow Of Celibacy: Erin's new novel is about a woman who decides to become abstinent
  • — You’re Good And I Love You: Erin discusses the pep talks she gives herself in the car
  • — Perpetual Threesome: In addition to her husband, Erin has had a girlfriend for 3 years. Fortunately everyone gets along ‘in a variety of ways.’
  • — Tears For Fears: Erin cries all the time. Keith can’t remember the last time he cried, and he’s saving his tears for Chemda’s tumor until it becomes malignant.
  • — Shut It: Keith and Erin bond over their spouses’ inability to close drawers and cabinets
  • — Bleeding Money: Following Speedo’s lead, more sponsors have dropped Ryan Lochte after his made-up Rio ‘mugging’ incident. The gang discusses Olympians who perform while ovulating.
  • — Plumbing The Depths: While staying at the Gatsby mansion, Keith’s wife Cathryn played Monopoly with the owner of FUBU on his $3,000 board and got a complimentary bidet that broke their toilet just in time for Keith’s flu
  • — Sharp Cheddar: An Indian police constable ate 40 knives because he ‘felt like it and enjoyed the taste’
  • — Working The Polls: 47% of KATG’s audience say they could date a sex worker. 87% believe explicit language should stop being censored on television. 1 listener (who may or may not be Keith) thinks Keith and Chemda together have a chance beating Chaz Kangas in a rap battle.

Guests

Erin JudgeErin Judge

Pictures

Erin Judge
Erin Judge


Ryan Lochte
Ryan Lochte
Fu Yuanhui
Fu Yuanhui
FUBU founder Daymond John
FUBU founder Daymond John
Cat playing monopoly with Daymond at the Gatsby mansion
Cat playing monopoly with Daymond at the Gatsby mansion
A TUSHY bidet
A TUSHY bidet


The knives swallowed by Indian police constable Surjeet Singh
The knives swallowed by Indian police constable Surjeet Singh
An adult diaper
An adult diaper
Leslie Jones
Leslie Jones

KATG 2455: Chemda and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

with Matteo Lane, Ray DeVito, and Mehran Khaghani – Listeners react to Chemda’s tumor; Ryan Lochte’s robbery lie; Ray’s gay experience as a kid; Mehran’s bad day August 23, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — Kickstart My Heart: Matteo Lane, Ray DeVito, and Mehran Khaghani, requested by Kickstarter supporters Jenni and Justin, are in studio
  • — Stay Positive: The gang discusses Chemda’s tumor
  • — Something’s Fishy Here: Ryan Lochte lied about being robbed at gunpoint. He was, instead, held by a security guard after him and his teammates urinated on and vandalized a gas station. Sponsors have dropped him.
  • — Dr. Mehran: Mehran, the world’s biggest distraction, takes the mic and doesn’t do a good job listening to Ray’s story about having a bad gay experience as a kid
  • — Walk It Off: Mehran talks about his bad day and offers Chemda some advice

Pictures

Matteo Lane with Kickstarter supporters Justin and Jenni
Matteo Lane with Kickstarter supporters Justin and Jenni
Justin, Jeni, Chemda, Ray DeVito, Mehran Khaghani, and Keith
Justin, Jeni, Chemda, Ray DeVito, Mehran Khaghani, and Keith
Ryan Lochte
Ryan Lochte
Ryan and The Boys at the gas station
Ryan and The Boys at the gas station
Steele Johnson
Steele Johnson
Jeromec.co/store
Jeromec.co/store

JJMArtwork.com
JJMArtwork.com

KATG 2454: Two Weeks Notice

with Hennessy, Michael Khalili, Danny Hatch, and Libby Phillips – Chemda makes an announcement August 21, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — How Was Your Weekend?: Chemda makes an announcement. Keith, Danny Hatch, Libby Phillips, Michael Khalili, and Hennessy react.

Pictures

Michael Khalili, Libby Phillips, and Danny Hatch
Michael Khalili, Libby Phillips, and Danny Hatch
Hennessy
Hennessy
Beyoncé
Beyoncé

Quincy Jones
Quincy Jones
Erik Bergstrom
Erik Bergstrom
Poison
Poison
Andrew Warner
Andrew Warner

KATG 2453: Life in the Fast Lane

with Matteo Lane – Manhattan’s Upper East Side; TV censorship; the state of the gay community; Bindi Irwin, Liza Minelli, Dina Lohan, Ina Garten, and Paula Deen; Olympic runners; man stabs couple and eats a victim’s face August 19, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — Goddamn Whistle Tones: Matteo Lane, with the voice of an angel, is in studio
  • — Baby Wheelchairs: Matteo recently moved to Manhattan’s Upper East Side
  • — The Wizard Of OZ: The gang tackles the topic of television censorship
  • — Gay Voice: Matteo knows he sounds gay, and he doesn’t need politically correct comedy show audiences to not laugh at his jokes about it
  • — No Meth: Matteo talks about the time he got booed off the stage at an AIDS festival
  • — Masc Top: Matteo delivers his State of the Gay Union address
  • — Bindi’s Adventures: Matteo hates child actors
  • — A Real Jazzer: Liza Minnelli checks in
  • — The Dina Trap: Matteo got to interview a heavily medicated Dina Lohan on the red carpet
  • — Jeffrey’s Girl: Matteo gives his thoughts on Ina Garten, her husband, and Paula Deen
  • — I Know, We Won: Keith shares a heartwarming story from the Women’s 5K race.
  • — Face Off: A college student stabbed a middle-aged couple he didn’t know to death and was in the process of eating the male victim’s face when he was arrested
  • — Three In One: Matteo has a lover he would marry if not for his too-big dick

Guests

Matteo LaneMatteo Lane

Pictures

Matteo Lane
Matteo Lane
Liza Treyger and Matteo on Living Dayton
Liza Treyger and Matteo on Living Dayton


Britney Spears
Britney Spears
Instagram.com/MatteoLane/
Instagram.com/MatteoLane/
Bindi Irwin
Bindi Irwin
Steve Irwin
Steve Irwin
A stingray
A stingray
Jonathan Lipnicki
Jonathan Lipnicki
Liza Minnelli
Liza Minnelli
Judy Garland
Judy Garland
Dina Lohan with Matteo's cousin
Dina Lohan with Matteo's cousin
Ina and Jeffrey Garten
Ina and Jeffrey Garten
Paula Deen
Paula Deen
Simone Biles
Simone Biles
Usain Bolt
Usain Bolt

Fallen runners Abbey D'Agostino and Nikki Hamblin
Fallen runners Abbey D'Agostino and Nikki Hamblin
Austin Harrouff, the Florida teen who killed a couple and tried to eat his male victim's face
Austin Harrouff, the Florida teen who killed a couple and tried to eat his male victim's face
Austin's victims Michelle Mishcon and John Stevens
Austin's victims Michelle Mishcon and John Stevens

KATG 2452: Pair-bonded

with Kaytlin Bailey – Being a prostitute; Florence Foster Jenkins reviewed; rough sex and husband fucking; Johnny Depp settled with Amber Heard for $7 million August 18, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — She Was Only 17: Kaytlin Bailey, comedian and prostitute, is in studio
  • — Anatomically Normal: Kaytlin discusses dating as a sex worker, including her relationship with her ex Jono Zalay and current lover Victor Varnado
  • — Aces: Keith reviews Florence Foster Jenkins and sober Suicide Squad
  • — Punching The Clown: Kaytlin discusses rough sex, impromptu marriage counseling, and more shenanigans she’s gotten up to while having sex for work and pleasure
  • — The Asshole's Wife: Johnny Depp paid Amber Heard more than $7,000,000 as part of their divorce settlement

Pictures

Kaytlin Bailey
Kaytlin Bailey

Jono Zalay
Jono Zalay
Victor Varnado
Victor Varnado



Cathryn at the Gatsby mansion
Cathryn at the Gatsby mansion
Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
Anthony Cumia
Anthony Cumia
Mel Gibson
Mel Gibson
Bill Cosby
Bill Cosby

KATG 2451: Rap It Up!

with Chaz Kangas – Chaz’s radio shows; Libby’s new behind-the-scenes show; Billy Bob Thornton denies having sex with Amber Heard and Amber and Johnny Depp reach a divorce settlement; Anthony Weiner at it again; Justin Bieber vs. Selena Gomez and his own fans; Wendell Pierce’s flooded home; Japanese pole vaulter knocks the bar down with his dick; Minnesota August 17, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — Best In The Business: Chaz Kangas, composer of the new KATG theme song, is in studio
  • — Spoon In The Ballad Salad: Chaz hosts 2 radio shows in his native Minnesota
  • — The Big 3-0: Chaz just celebrated a very big birthday
  • — Everybody’s Fired: Libby joins the program to discuss her new behind-the-scenes KATG VIP show
  • — Johnny Drama: Billy Bob Thornton would like Johnny Depp to know he never had sex with Amber Heard. Amber and Johnny reached a divorce settlement. Chaz makes sense of it all with rap.
  • — The Mongoose: Anthony Weiner is at it again, this time being caught sending flirty Twitter messages to a man pretending to be a hot woman. But hey, at least he’s not as bad as Donald Trump. Let’s see what magic Chaz can make from this.
  • — She’s Only 17: Justin Bieber deleted his Instagram because his fans left too many mean comments about his underage girlfriend
  • — Now We Will Care For You: Actor Wendell Pierce lost his Baton Rouge house in a flood
  • — Great USA: America is still the best! A Japanese Olympic pole vaulter disqualified himself when his dick knocked over the bar. Chaz sums it up for us with a piano ballad. Just kidding, it's rap.
  • — Sledgehammer: Chaz made a mix to commemorate specific memories and experiences from his first 30 years on Earth
  • — Crack Free Since 2016: Chaz discusses his move back to his Minnesota, where nobody smokes crack and takes their clothes off on the subway

Guests

Chaz KangasChaz Kangas

Pictures

Chaz Kangas
Chaz Kangas

Billy Bob Thornton
Billy Bob Thornton
Amber Heard and Johnny Depp
Amber Heard and Johnny Depp
Anthony Weiner
Anthony Weiner
Weiner's wiener
Weiner's wiener
Justin Bieber and Sofia Richie
Justin Bieber and Sofia Richie
Selena Gomez
Selena Gomez
Zayn Malik
Zayn Malik
Wendell Pierce
Wendell Pierce
Japanese pole vaulter Hiroki Ogita
Japanese pole vaulter Hiroki Ogita
Chaz's birthday mix
Chaz's birthday mix

NYC's crack smoking subway nudist
NYC's crack smoking subway nudist

KATG 2450: Done with Weiners

with Brooke Arnold and Laura Hooper – Brooke’s one-woman show about growing up fundamentalist Christian; being a gymnast with breasts; Rio 2016 and the Mercy Rule; Pete’s Dragon review; more proof of Johnny Depp’s rage and KATG polls August 16, 2016

Listen to the show

Loading audio player... (requires a modern browser to work)

Watch the full episode

Show Notes

  • — Growing Up Fundie: Brooke Arnold, former KATG apprentice and fundamentalist Christian, and Laura Hooper, the director of Brooke’s one-woman show, are in studio
  • — Gymnastics Cult: Laura used to be a rhythmic gymnast but quit when her boobs grew in
  • — GOOOOOAAAAAL: The U.S. is doing so well in the Olympics that there should probably be some sort of mercy rule, but not the kind that Danny’s childhood soccer team followed
  • — Big Gay Ben: Brooke can’t watch Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt or Jesus Camp without experiencing PTSD. Laura had to experience life as a Mormon for drama school.
  • — Bald Spot: Brooke discusses the moment she realized everything she’d been taught was hogwash
  • — Back To The Sleeves: Brooke has a hard time showing her arms because of her very puritan upbringing, and the one time she tried going sleeveless ended with her being catcalled
  • — Hi Miss Brooke: Brooke discusses some of the terrifying messages she’s received from devout Christian strangers. A man punched Brooke in the head on a packed subway train when her flip-flop brushed against his pant-leg.
  • — It’s For Children: Keith reviews the Pete’s Dragon reboot
  • — Hands Off: According to Amber Heard, Johnny Depp accidentally cut his fingertip off in a drug-induced rage before using his stump to paint an angry message to Amber. 100% of KATG’s audience is now on Team Amber. 81% believe Jared Leto should be in Arkham Asylum. 31% think Jason Burke is too pretty.

Pictures

Brooke Arnold and Laura Hooper
Brooke Arnold and Laura Hooper
Best Self Co.’s Cathryn and Allen
Best Self Co.’s Cathryn and Allen
NYSE’s Shopify banner the night before feat. Best Self Co.
NYSE’s Shopify banner the night before feat. Best Self Co.
The banner the day of
The banner the day of
Ringing The NYSE Bell
Ringing The NYSE Bell

Rhythmic gymnastics
Rhythmic gymnastics



Kim Jong Un, Dr. Evil, and Hillary Clinton
Kim Jong Un, Dr. Evil, and Hillary Clinton
Caitlyn Jenner
Caitlyn Jenner




Christopher Reeve
Christopher Reeve
Christopher Walken
Christopher Walken


Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
Johnny's finger
Johnny's finger
Johnny's art
Johnny's art
Christian Bale
Christian Bale
Jared Leto
Jared Leto
Jason Burke
Jason Burke
Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer
Roseanne Barr
Roseanne Barr
Paul Marcarelli
Paul Marcarelli
loading something